Here we go..

Well for me at the time after my kids dad cheated, and i was living at home, i just did what i had to do to survive, that's when I developed my survival skills, that I still carry with me, and that I see I have passed on to my oldest daughter. Now at this time i made a lot of mistakes, and it wasn't till recently that I realized how much my choices back then, still affect me, and my children today. But that's another time. So i started to hang out with the friends I still had, who were also having babies, and just going through the motions. I'm thankful to my family for sticking by me and my kids at the time, because it could have been a lot harder. But my kids were young, and didn't understand what was going on. SO moving forward, a year later i moved with my mom to the opposite side of town, and tried to start a new life. The one thing that I always felt uneasy about was having to be on public assistance, it was demeaning at times, but i had to do what I had to do. So as I'm living life and doing the daily grind, here comes this guy out of no where, starts a conversation with me, and from that day forward we were inseparable. He was 17, just like me, and he feel in love with my kids. When I look at that now, its weird to comprehend, because i look at my children and for the life of me I can't picture them with 2 kids right now. Oh No I had to shake my head right now, because that's hard to comprehend. LOL Anyway like I said he was the one. Now yes I had kids with another man, but he wanted to love me and be with me and my children and that's all I needed. Now he wasn't going in the right direction in life at the time, but when you fall in love you don't see that, you just want him. But he did what he had to, for being 17, to support and be there for us. In my mind he was my first in everything that happened for the next 9yrs of our lives. We lived with my mom for awhile, then for a few years lived in a few different apartments, and just lived, wasn't the best but it was ours and we were happy. So while we are living, my childrens father went to prison for 7yrs, my son was 1yr, my daughter was 2 1/2, and they had no clue, they had a dad who loved them, who helped them in everything they needed, was there for them and who wasn't gonna let them get hurt. But he couldn't protect them forever.